how to overcome fear of rejection and reach your full potential

We’ve all heard of the fear of rejection when it comes to relationships, but you might be surprised by the other ways your fear of rejection might be showing up in your life and holding you back from your full potential.

Over the past year I’ve really been focusing on paying attention to different ways fear is showing up in my life. And one thing I noticed, both for myself and my clients, is how often the fear of rejection shows up in our day. Often it shows up in ways you never would have expected, nestled at the root of some of our other fears.

So if you’re feeling stuck or like your progress is slow going, ask yourself what your relationship with rejection is.

More likely than not, it’s not a positive one. We are taught to avoid rejection in order to avoid judgement and shame. And it’s not hard to understand why! However, rejection doesn’t have to remain this big and scary thing that we avoid at all costs. In fact, rejection is very necessary on your (sometimes uncomfortable) path to success.

How, though, do we change our relationship with rejection and prevent our fear from keeping us stuck?

Here’s a few things I’ve learned over the past year or so that have been extremely helpful to me:

understand that there is room for you at the top

If you want to achieve bigger things and create a more rewarding life for yourself, you’re going to have to put yourself out there. You’re going to have to start taking up more space. And actually, let’s change that up to using up more space, because I think the idea of taking up more space is implying that there’s a limited amount of space for everyone and you’re going to have to push your way in to fit.

It’s a limiting belief that there’s not enough space at the top, and even though most of us probably won’t become the next Oprah or Jeff Bezos, it’s time to start opening yourself up to the truth that there is plenty of room for you up there where you want to be.

That place is your “top” based on what successful and fulfilled means for you. It’s important to talk about this because knowing what you’re fighting for and accepting that it’s possible is going to be a huge motivator to face your fear of rejection.

change your perspective of rejection

Rejection doesn’t need to be feared because rejection is not a negative thing. Rejection is not some sort of punishment from the universe to put you back in your place. Rejection is just redirection. It says “you don’t need to be here right in this moment, but you should go look over there. There might be something for you there.”

Remember too that courage isn’t the absence of fear, it’s the decision to move forward despite the fear. You’re fear is totally natural and even the pros feel that fear! But we can chisel away at it over time and start to develop a healthier relationship with it; one that no longer leaves you paralyzed from action altogether.

Accept rejection as a necessary part of the process. You don’t want everyone to say yes to you. Not everyone is your person. Not every opportunity is right for you. But every time someone tells you no, they cross themselves off of list and free up space for you to find what you actually need right now.

every no is one step closer to a yes

If you want opportunities to open up for you, you’re going to have to clock in some no’s. Just accept that. Expect it even. When you go into it expecting some no’s, you won’t be disappointed back into paralysis when you get them.

Instead, remind yourself if you put yourself out there 100 times, you might get 80 rejections, but you also could receive 20 ecstatic yes’s! If you don’t put yourself out there at all, or you only do it once and then let disappointment stop you from trying again, then you’ll never receive those 20 yes’s.

You’ll be stuck at zero with nothing to show for it except a slightly bruised ego.

Which brings me to my next point:

rejection is going to be uncomfortable at first

You’re going to have to do the mindset work + take action to really change your relationship with rejection into a more positive one. It’s not going anywhere to happen overnight.

So start making a habit of putting yourself out there today, and begin to make a habit of it. This is a muscle you need to work out - it might hurt at first, but it will get stronger and soon these things that feel so big and scary right now will become near effortless.

Remember, the more you put in, the more you will get out.

The longer you stay in safely inside your comfort zone, the longer you’re going to stay stuck and wishing there was more. If you want something, go out there and get it! Accept and embrace the fact that it’s going to be uncomfortable at first. Accept that rejection is part of the process. Accept that these are just necessary parts of the process.

The sooner you do that, the sooner you can truly unlock your true potential.

I know you’re worried about what people will think. I know you’re worried someone might laugh at you. I know you’re worried you aren’t good enough. But you can either let your fear smother you in submission, or you can carry it with you as you take action, and feel it become lighter as your own strength grows.

Have you been feeling stuck for awhile, paralyzed by indecision, and unsure or your purpose or path?

I get it, because I have been there. I’ve had to put in a lot of work, thousands of dollars on courses and coaching, and countless hours reading self help books and articles learning how to get unstuck and finally commit to my goals.

Now I’m pouring this knowledge into others and helping them realize their own potential. If you are ready to commit to yourself and create a life you’re passionate about, you can check out my coaching program here or email me about chatting over a FREE 15 min discovery call to see if we are a good fit!